Touch typing…

Nah this doesnt mean i am trying to tpe without leaving my hands.. all i mean is like touch typing.. i am letting myself write efforlessly. I am not sure what i want to write, but the urge to write is too strong.. not to comply…

Well these few days.. since diwali infact i am feeling low.. its been 2 months now.. ahvent been involved in any volunteerign work…

Oh yeh i am becoming disinterested in reading boooks : i ahve 2 books to complete.. and yet both are left alone…

I am becoming disinterested in orkutting too.. many a times i sit in front of computer.. god knows what i do.. but i dun post in any comm.. or seek to talk to ppl.. nowadays unless invited,… I dun login into chat software… and if ilogin.. i dun buzz ppl…

I am disinterested.. I am lazy and i am feeling down..

And.. i ahve yet had nice conversations with many ppl… It feels good but if it wasnt there also i cudnt care less..

It is good in a way i guess.. whatever…

I feel i complain too much.. i guess i do..

Damn.. i dunno what else to write.. it doesnt feel right…

I know what i wanna do at this point of time.. this uneasiness at the bottom of my belly.. is familiar….

I wanna sit on the darkest corner of my tarace. hostel tarrace.. feet dangling in the air.. facing away from the door.. yes… I wanna stare into darkness and think nothing…

I wanna smell the campfire i wanna hear the farmers sitting watch in the night.. i wanna hear him sing local songs….

I wanna see stars so many of them that they overwhelm me.. I wanna feel so minusclue that i become invisible.. I wanna sing melancholy song.. slowly humming.. and then making weird noises..

I wanna laugh alone… on my stewpidity.. And then i wanna wait till early dawn. I wanna sleep on the tarrace.. all alone… feel like there is no one but me.. Then i wanna go to that little niche… that forgotten temple on the base of the mountain.. I wanna go to the tarrace and try to catch the clouds floating by…

I wanna sit on that favorite rock of mine… I wanna dangle my feet in the flowing creek.. I wana feel the comfort… hiddden from the world.. I wanna feel that warm friendship i felt.. that comfort.. that feeling of hope… I wanna recapture it.. that feeling of goodness.. trust that i am no longer alone… I guess its foreevr lost…

I am not that naive anymore.. nor as tolerating……

May be i ahve lost hope thats all.. I dunnoo

Advertisements

Humor me please? *winks*

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s