Controversial Sex…

I watched an interesting movie on Sony Pix today.. As it happens ( and it happens usually) I don’t remember the name of the movie.. And I missed theย  start and the end of the movie…

It was about this scientist, who against his fathers wishes decided to be a biologist. He initially worked on insects, wasps in particular but later in his life goes on to research on sexual behaviours of humans.

Since I don’t know how the story goes.. I am not really gonna talk about it.. however, I was struck by few points while watching the movie..

—> the discomfort people feel while talking about sex.. when everyone has it sooner or later

—> If sex was not so sensationalized as the “forbidden fruit” probably all its charm would disappear.. and it would become simply and exercise and then probably a chore.. (but then I realize I am not the best person to talk about it)

—> Females romanticize it and males make it dirty.. in their dreams… (or is generally said)

—> The atrocities against the “queers” of any kind are so cruel that it reminds me of pigeons beaked to death by others ( as it was touched by humans)

Any ways.. moving on…

He , as in the scientist in the story, made a research wherein he talked with a wide range of people both females and males.. and rated them as per their sexuality.. and his conclusion was that most people show varying proportions of bi sexuality.. there are very little “purely” homosexuals and “purely” hetero sexuals… most people are actually bi sexuals. They repress that part of themselves so as to confirm to the societal standards

Now I wonder how many of you guys think this is true?

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72 thoughts on “Controversial Sex…

    1. IHM he included bisexual tendencies like females trying to be like males.. some females prefer getting “comforted” by females ( best friends).. its not simply sex in its barest form but in all connotations..

      I am not sure yet whether I agree with him or not.. hence this discussion ๐Ÿ™‚

      1. I agree with ‘some females prefer getting โ€œcomfortedโ€ by females ( best friends)…’ and with ,
        “…his conclusion was that most people show varying proportions of bi sexuality..”

        I did think it was only about sex ๐Ÿ™‚

  1. Interesting movie this sounds like ๐Ÿ™‚

    I think this is true… ๐Ÿ™‚
    though when we say bisexuals we dont mean that people ‘repress’ themselves but that rather at times they might also feel that another man is attractive or another woman…(in the case of the same genders)
    repressed would be something else…it would be more the need to come out of the closet for one’s own self if for no one else…but not being able to do so for various reasons

    1. Like let say a man is feminine .. but not homosexual ( like cross dressers but not homosexuals) Arent they really bisexuals? They are showing both masculine n feminine characteristics..

      So now.. if a male makes this “male” feel “feminine” wouldn’t then this said feminine man.. be attracted to this guy ? and if he does.. isnt he then umm homosexual too ?

      I dunno what I am trying to say lol!

      Lets take the movie “Fire”.. actually in that movie.. it wasnt about Lesbians as much as “bisexuality”..if the females had happy sex life with their husbands they would have never been into a relationship..

      How do we explain homosexual relationships in hostels? There has to be some basis no ?

      1. hmmm I got confused in there with the first para ๐Ÿ˜€
        but yeah I do agree with the theory to an extent…I mean it s not a taboo thing…it just is…

        a lot of youngsters ‘experiment’

        complex topic Winnie…

          1. I agree gay men do have a tendency to act feminine BUT I have learnt from a friend that most cross dressers are straight or bi.

  2. But I agree with,

    ,i>1. If sex was not so sensationalized as the โ€œforbidden fruitโ€ probably all its charm would disappear.. and it would become simply and exercise and then probably a chore..

    2. The atrocities against the โ€œqueersโ€ of any kind are so cruel that it reminds me of pigeons beaked to death by others.

  3. I think that most people are homo sexual in nature…… yes, people do find “same sex members” attractive but there is a difference between admiration and lust!!!!! ๐Ÿ˜› ๐Ÿ˜› ๐Ÿ˜›

        1. slip of the finger…. ๐Ÿ™‚
          That is what happens when you are thinking of work and writing a comment ๐Ÿ˜› ๐Ÿ˜›

      1. Ajit! It is also cool with us if you swing both ways. ๐Ÿ˜› I mean you’ve heard what they say, you only live one. ๐Ÿ˜‰ ๐Ÿ˜†

    1. Ajit. We know what was going through your mind when writing this. It’s fine by us if you bat for the same team. ๐Ÿ˜‰ ๐Ÿ˜›

        1. OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
          and I thought that Badz was a sweet innocent dudette!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
          no Thanks, I am happy being “HETERO”……….. ๐Ÿ™‚
          LOL, Badz, that truly was Bad!!!! ๐Ÿ˜› ๐Ÿ˜› ๐Ÿ˜›

          1. LoL! I am (usually). :angel:
            Just couldn’t resisted today. ๐Ÿ˜ˆ ๐Ÿ˜›
            I’ll be on my best behavious from now. ๐Ÿ™‚ (Well will certainly try. ๐Ÿ˜‰ )

              1. I was just kidding ๐Ÿ™‚ ๐Ÿ˜›
                dont feel sorry….. ๐Ÿ™‚ LOL!!!!!!! hehehehehe….
                and I know you were kidding when you said, “I am sorry” ๐Ÿ˜›

                    1. LoL! I want to keep my “innocent dudette” Crown. ๐Ÿ˜‰ ๐Ÿ˜†

                      Innocent huh? ๐Ÿ˜ˆ

  4. I think it is true… but I don’t think we suppress it. I think it is present in such a small fraction that you don’t actually have to suppress it.

    But I disagree with all your points
    People feel discomfort while talking about too many things which we all do… daily
    Humans are exceptions and they enjoy sex

    1. All my points bhav? ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

      Yes we are supposed to enjoy sex.. but still there are many women who dont get orgasm for a long time .. may be never..

      And it is a taboo topic.. it was Taboo in other countries too for such a long time.. Even USA why?

      Everyone knows sex happens.. but can you imagine that your parents have sex? no…

      Well do tell me why dont agree to other points

      1. Woman don’t get orgasms because they don’t understand their bodies. A woman usually gets her first orgasm through masturbation. Then from that she learns what works for her and what doesn’t.

          1. Yes. I guess it’s out of fear. Most women are afraid of admitting they masturbate. Or are even afraid of doing it. Mainly because as aa child, their mother scold them for touching themselves hence it comes accross as a negative thing. Whereas in reality it isn’t. As long as you’re not doing it in public, it’s fine. Although you may disagree.

  5. I don’t know about this theory, but I do know that homosexuality or bi-sexuality, even heterosexuality for that matter, is just a thing of the mind. This has also been proven medically… my roommate’s a doctor, and that’s how I know this.

    This means that every human body has the ability to be both homosexual as well as heterosexual… thereby making them, essentially, if you remove the mental thing that is – bi-sexual.

    I still wouldn’t say that this is the case with all of us, but then theoretically, it’s possible.

    Hope that made sense ๐Ÿ™‚ Cheers…

      1. I didn’t really agree with it too, but then it has been proven medically. All the hormones and all that are responsible for us being gay or straight, everyone has them… it’s just the brain that decides which ones to release, and which ones to keep locked up… which leads us back to the point I said in the previous comment.

          1. We can’t induce the happiness on the concious level, but the brain does it for us… on a subconcious level. Which is why, counselling can help to get you out of depression.

            Connecting this to the sexuality of a person, counselling has also converted gay and bi-sexual people to straight guys. Physically, there is nothing different between a straight person and a gay person, which is the reason why counselling works.

            Stating that every human being is – rather can be – bi-sexual is just a theoretical extension of this argument.

            1. Connecting this to the sexuality of a person, counselling has also converted gay and bi-sexual people to straight guys.

              This is a myth.. there is no proof of this ๐Ÿ™‚

              1. It’s not a myth, I know someone to whom it has happened. In fact, right now, she’s happily engaged.

                My roomie has also seen it happen to a few people, he had friends from the psychology or psychiatry (I always get confused between those two!) wings, and he’s told me a few stories about that as well. I don’t know about you, but after hearing those first hand stories, doesn’t sound like a myth to me at all.

                1. Well I am still skeptical. Will research and get back to you ๐Ÿ™‚

                  My roomie in college was a lesbian.. her family married her off forcefully..

                  She couldnt stand him touching her and she ran off.. now no one knows where she is.. so well I am kinda skeptical ๐Ÿ™‚

                  1. I wouldn’t go through each and every point from each and every article that you quoted, because I’d like to keep this short.

                    I agree with the point that being gay is not an illness. No attempts, therefore, should be taken to “cure” it, and saying that was never my point. I think you misunderstood me completely there.

                    All I am saying is that it is a thing purely of the mind. Every human being is equipped by nature to be gay, or not gay – just as he is to be depressed, or happy. There might have been many cases wherein the attempts at a cure became destructive, but I’m not at all interested in that – simply because I wasn’t talking about whether it’s right or wrong to be gay. If you do want my opinion about that, I don’t have any problem with it. My point still remains where it was – it is a thing of the mind.

                    I see that in the end, I really couldn’t keep it that short.

                    1. One more thought I want to simply express .. tell me what you feel about it…

                      What if.. these ppl who get cured are not homosexuals.. but bi sexuals? and they simply repress their homosexual tendencies? .. I mean since they do have heterosexual tendencies.. its very much possible no ?

                    2. I don’t know about what happens practically, but to me, theoretically it is very much possible.

                      I’d give you another example, which can be related – in our specific, weird way, to the discussion – when you’re nervous, just before an interview or a presentation, your body tends to react to that. Sweating of the palms, on the forehead, the voice tends to go higher, stuff like that. However, if you fake confidence, and do it convincingly, you can fool your body into thinking that you are, indeed confident. Then, you see that the sweating stops, the chills from the adrenaline rush stops, and the voice becomes stronger and more confident. This has happened to me ๐Ÿ™‚

                      Similarly, the mind can effectively fool the body into believing that they are heterosexuals, or homosexuals, or bi-sexuals… which again brings us back to where we started from, that the sexuality of a person is a mind game.

                      In that case what is our default orientation?

                      Also, I wasn’t talking about the “cure” for these people at all. I still don’t think that external forces can act so much about things of the mind, but my Doctor friends keep insisting that it does. I somehow, am still skeptical about that.

                      As far as I think about it.. I recently saw a play by chetan dutta, where the homosexual is so tired of the confusion that he goes to this reknowned psychiatrist who claims he can cure it. When he asks if he can completely stop being tempted.. the psychiatrist says no thats not good for you. The better option would be to have one loyal partner who wouldnt come between your wife and family and keep your secret. Some one trustworthy.. someone like me..

                      This is what I think ๐Ÿ™‚

  6. yavvry yeddu is dipperent Pooheedee, its not right to generalise and come to a conclusion. More over this chapee is mixing different subjects, as i understand from what you say.

    Howsee yoos Pooheedee ? whatta yoo doings ? Me chumma sittin doin nuttin, whasetin times. vonly sleepin and sleepin, fiddlin wid tings and makin a mess of yavvryting. and as usual makin my friends very angry. Apter i make dem angry i have kaapee and i smoke to make dem more angry.
    Hopees you happees Pooheedees.

    1. Rauf!!! Where have you been? ๐Ÿ˜€ ๐Ÿ˜€ Ah making ppl angry thats the usual thing for you no? How can ppl be angry with you? You are Choooo Sweet!!!

      I am not accepting him at all.. am asking ppl to discuss coz I am not sure of it at all ๐Ÿ™‚

      Its raining here in bangalore and It is beautifull!!! when its not hot.. but then it can never be as hot as chennai! How can you stand all the heat? no wonder you are doing nothing but making ppl angry!

      I miss your posts.. I drop in all the time to see those pictures!! You should hold an exhibition for it and all!!

      ๐Ÿ™‚

  7. Even I end up watching movies like this sometimes… ๐Ÿ˜€

    I am not sure if that can be said true (except for a few), but something I read about dream interpretation which might add on to it. Here’s an excerpt.

    The Anima is the personification of all feminine psychological tendencies within a man, the archetypal feminine symbolism within a man’s unconscious.

    The Animus is the personification of all masculine psychological tendencies within a woman, the archetypal masculine symbolism within a woman’s unconscious.

    In dreams Jung said that the animus is more likely to be personified by multiple male figures, while the anima is frequently a single female.

    One might look on the concept of anima-animus as a kind of yin/yang solution to the duality of human sexuality. They are products of the long human experience of man with woman and woman with man: as man has opened to his feminine nature, so has woman a corresponding male side. They also act as collective images which motivate each sex to respond to and understand members of the other gender. That is, a man apprehends the nature of woman by virtue of his hidden anima, โ€“ and reciprocating, the woman is able to grasp the nature of maleness via her animus.

  8. I agree with the point that if sex were not sensationalized then it might lose its charm. It might become like, say, wanting to eat an ice cream – pretty normal right. I have a feeling (might be totally wrong) that people tend to over expect and end up becoming repressed. Probably they want to try the different flavours if they don’t get the expected levels happiness in the first place. That’s one reason why I feel this thought should not over-consume the minds of youngsters. Perhaps, they should also develop some interest in other activities and hobbies, which gives them a good deal of happiness in different ways and helps them not to feel repressed.

    Destination Infinity

    1. Couldn’t agree more ๐Ÿ™‚

      But I also think its natural that youngster are obsessed with it.. so that they are urged to procreate ๐Ÿ™‚

      Coz logically thats the phase when they r at the peak of their health ๐Ÿ™‚

  9. I ll comment in two days time. Logging off now. Work keeps me ccupied. I want to leave a pretty long comment. hence:-)

  10. Well I agree with the scientist. Most people (manly females) do have sexually desires (even fantasies) for the same sex. They donโ€™t usually express them but it is a curiosity for them to try and find how it would feel to kiss, lick, suck (give pleasure) to another person from the same sex. Whether that makes the bi or not, I donโ€™t know. BUT I guess again it is another โ€œa forbidden fruit.โ€

    I do agree that most people (again mainly females) do find it uncomfortable talking/discussing the topic of sex. I guess that is to do with the mentality/thinking of our society today. Most women (and men) are not comfortable changing in front of their partner. This makes no sense to me. I can have sex with you but canโ€™t change/get undressed in front of you. I know Iโ€™m going off the point a bit BUT I find those people hypocrites.

    โ€œFemales romanticize it and males make it dirty… in their dreamsโ€ฆ (or is generally said)โ€ I find this point to be true. Iโ€™ve learnt, when females fantasize, they tend to remember an ex partner and the great sex they had with them or about a romantic novel they had read. Whereas males fantasize about a porn clip they had seen or something they had read about. E.g. having anal sex or having sex with 2 women, etc.

  11. โ€”> “the discomfort people feel while talking about sex.. when everyone has it sooner or later”

    Absolutely. There was this recent article in a national daily about two sides arguing over implementation of sex education schools. Here goes a reputed political head’s statement ” is it not foolish to be talking about such unhealthy stuff? We don’t the kids to start fantasizing when they are in primary class”. Now, what can you say about this trend?! I mean, Its important to be talking it out than learning through the other sources. And why on earth shld India be Second in the HIV hit-list? Presumptions and stupid dogmas in the name of morality. people ought to understand tht talking abt safe sex is better than dying by having unsafe sex.We are tempted only when there is a ‘forbidden’ fruit, like you rightly said.

    โ€”> If sex was not so sensationalized as the โ€œforbidden fruitโ€ probably all its charm would disappear.. and it would become simply and exercise and then probably a chore.. (but then I realize I am not the best person to talk about it)
    -Perhaps. I don’t think I ve an arguement over this. Might as well be true. But we ve read of males wanting to ve sex even when they are in their ripe old age. Which means that they still fantasize and want to explore.

    โ€”> Females romanticize it and males make it dirty.. in their dreamsโ€ฆ (or is generally said)

    -AGREED CENT PERCENT.

    Talking of Bisexuals- I think it stops at admiration towards the same sex individual. But there has existed a ritual in ancient greece , kind of secret Bi society. But since I lost the link somewhere, I really can’t give you any authentication over this ritual stuff. As far Lesbians and Gays, I neither accept them nor disagree with them. Everyone has their own stands and what is better than doing what you like with whom you like ?!

    I mean, pretty long comment. Not sure if I ve made sense.

    1. Oh you have ๐Ÿ™‚

      You know why ppl are afraid of sex education ?

      1. They never received it
      2. They simply resist change!
      3. They are aware that if kids become aware of what sexual abuse is.. no parent can live with the thought that they have done their duty.
      4. We are all victimized atleast once in life * in any sexual form* that we accept it as its okay..

      I simply recommend you to read the book “bitter chocolate” by Pinky Virani

      She has compiled real time stories about children with abuse..

      Many times the mother blames the child.. coz she is so dependent on the husband and is so used to being a victim that she was in no position to help her child in any way..

      We all can see the symptoms but we over look it

      Phew! This is a cause close to my heart.. i can go on and on about it!

      1. I surely will ๐Ÿ™‚ I mean, Child abuse. A dear cause I look forward to work for in the future. I mean, I know some real-life pple. Terrible.

Humor me please? *winks*

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