Acceptance and apology

P.S: Extremely personal.

How much ever painful it is, I have finally accepted and am now ready to move on. I am happy that he was not soft or kind with it. For every kind word would have carried a sliver of hope, and for someone as lonesome and desperate as me, that would have been enough to hold on to. As they say.. doobte ko tinke ka sahara bhi kaafi hota hai..

So in the end, he indeed did a favor on me. And the ‘shiqwe’ ‘gile’ I would have.. well his indifference has cowered them into silence 😛 I wish it had gone differently. That he had not started what he couldn’t finish or that I wasn’t a willing accomplice. But he did and I was. So I couldn’t really blame him can I? And for the desperation I showed at every juncture, well that is solely my doing. Nothing he said nor his actions warranted such tumult of emotion nor such silly devotion. But I did offer my heart on the platter. How could I blame him for the way he behaved? esp when my own actions make me culpable?

And so, I want to apologize to someone today. Someone, whom I have wronged mightily. Someone, whose emotions I toyed with. Whom I gave false hope without realizing what I was doing. I guess I proved it again that you only realize that you are mistaken when the samething happens to you..

May be one day, I shall say this to his face, but until then, Sorry my friend…

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Humor me please? *winks*

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