What does one do when one is lost in one’s own “losing” ?
I stumble as I climb, as I get down. I dont know if I am climbing or alighting anymore. It would be easier to stop, but I no longer know what stopping is.
What does one do when one question’s one core and find it a fake?
I scramble through my much fond musings and find nothing to be fond about. I take my sadness and find nothing to be sad about. I glory in my happiness and then find there was nothing to be happy about.
I surprise myself with smiles as often as I do with tears. And yet, I find no reason for either.
I find myself quite unreasonably reasonable. Quiet in quite a noisy way.
What does one do when one unravels the questions and find oneself grasping for straws to answer.. and failing at that.
I find myself quite unquestionably lost and yet, I have no idea why, wherefore or how I am lost.
I am here and yet not. I am….
Who am i?
Rather what am I?
Sometimes I wonder… am I ?
I am so many adjectives, so many metaphors, mine and others, so many nouns, fond and quite forgotten, that I no longer am familiar with this unshakable, quite easily transferable, a much definitive pronoun I.
Interestingly, for someone who is so lost, I use a lot of “I”.